I wish things could just work out for us.

I miss him terribly, but things are just rocky whenever we're together. I enjoy the single life, but I hate thinking of him with someone else. Gahhh.

There are few things I wouldn't give to hold him in my arms again. Everything I've done to try to get over him makes me just appreciate him more.

Love sucks.

¶ 20:11

After Wal-Mart,

My car was puked in, and completely gross-ified. Matt was taken out for his birthday and, of course, drank too many shots with his friend. He puked his guts out while he was waiting for me, and I thought he had gotten it out of his system. He was crying and being wholly regretful. It was actually funny to watch. I took a video, and just laughed. He got sick out the window and all down the side of my car. Then, again. And, again. Then, it started to not go out window. It got across my window, and it began to smear every time the window went up or down. Then, one time on the highway, he tried to throw up out the window; however, because of the wind, it call came back in the car. He was covered and it was everywhere. I just laughed, knowing that it could be taken care of.

The next morning, I scrambled to find a detailing place to scrub it and steam clean the carpets and condition my seats, all the while trying to get ready to run to Hartford to see the Transiberian Orchestra. It turns out that many of these places aren’t open on Sundays… who knew? I find a place, and after dropping of Matt and Quincy scurry back to Cambridge. He was going to shower and meet me back at the Galleria.

Come to find out, despite living in Boston his ENTIRE life, he doesn’t know how to get there. I’m still a newb when it comes to directions in Boston, and coordinating my pick up was more like an Abbott and Costello skit:

Me: Where are you now?
Him: Outside the building. Right in front.
Me: Which side, Matthew? There are four.
Him: The side with Macy’s.
Me: Macy’s is on a corner, dear. Which side? Where are you in relation to the Royal Sonesta?
You get the picture… Chaos.

He still hadn’t eaten, and I was trying to get him food in the mall while directing him through an area that I don’t know. He kept reading me the names of streets, and I kept reminding him that I didn’t know street names. For such a queen, you would think he would know how to get the stupid Galleria. In a conversation, I swore he said that he’d been there and didn’t care for it. I guess I remembered wrong.

After he picks me up on the other side of the divided highway next to the mall, which I sprinted over in the hurricane, we got on the road a bit later than we hoped. It was then we encountered the worst holiday traffic I have ever seen. I didn’t even consider the traffic when I bought the tickets, and of course, opted out of the insurance. Matt’s still hung over from his birthday night out, and I’m just laughing at how wrong things have gone. Not to mention, it’s POURING.

After about an hour and a half and only getting as far as Worcester, we turn around. We get in my driveway, and realize that my house keys are with my car keys – getting detailed. Fortunately, my roommate was home and was able to let us in. We chill at my place for a little bit, and then decide to go get my car at the Cambridgeside Galleria. Halfway there, we realize that I left my spare key back at the house and still do not have my house keys. Only this time, no roommates are home. I get in through the pouring rain in the basement and go up the backstairs and realize how insecure my house really is. Then, we go back to the I leave Matt, and run through the rain into the depth of the parking garage.

Then, I realize that I left my wallet in his car. So, I try to call him, but I have no signal. I’m looking for a place to make a call frantically so he doesn’t get on the highway to go home. I finally squeeze out a text message – and (you’ve probably noticed how things seem to be getting worse) when my phone dies. Now, I have a charger in my car, but where my car is parked… there is no signal. And, I can’t get out of the parking garage, because I have no cash. So, he texts me back saying he was “where he was before.”

So, I go through the garage, out into the rain to where he just dropped me off. He was no where to be found. I walk down the street a bit in each direction, thinking he might be at another garage entrance, and just confused. Nope. I’m soaked. I’m pissed.

I go back through the garage and get back in my car. Please keep in mind that my car has a low battery and needs to be started when ever I use my phone charger. I drive through the garage looking for a spot near where the signal god blesses me. I call him. I learned at this point, that he was across the street at the Royal Sonesta, and that ‘before’ really meant ‘way before, earlier today.’ Sigh.

I’m slightly less amused at this point, and his innocence has gone from being cute to being god damned annoying. I let him know. He wasn’t acting out of spite and I did feel really bad for loosing my temper.

I got home at about 8PM and locked myself inside with a bottle of wine.

¶ 22:08

RCN can suck my junk.

I wish I could overcharge people for back products and then deny then the access to the working equipment they pay for... and not be killed by an angry mob.

Please. Do not ever EVER consider them as a provider. They deserve to fail.

Our house remote has what I believe an RCN tech would refer to as 'limited functionality,' and our recording function is having 'playback issues.'

Talk about frustrating... I can barely navigate to the page to watch my South Park and Family Guy re-runs, then they stop playing part way through. WTF.

¶ 22:39

For reasons which escape me currently, I became one of those crazy Black Friday shoppers Thursday night at about 10PM. Yes, it's true; I was one of those over-caffeinated, bundled up crazy persons waiting in line for some stupid sale. Now, under normal circumstances, I could not be bothered waiting that long for ANYTHING - Lest of all, wait in line at Wal-Mart. You're reading the blog of someone who doesn't even do his own laundry, and anyone who knows me will surely attest.


I roll into the parking lot of my local Wal-Mart, because, ya know, I like to keep things classy. Vastly more important than class, however, was a 42" Polaroid LCD TV for $598. I arrived at about 9, expecting the droves of people making their Day-after-Thanksgiving homage to the retail temples, only to find an empty parking lot. After a quick reality check, I decided to go to Dunkin' Donuts.


At 10, I roll in to see one other person that shares the same level of insanity that I was sporting. Matt arrives about half past 11 to be the fourth car in the lot.


[On a side note, I have always wished my life was a DVR with the capability to fast forward or pause as I see fit. I'll spare you about 6 of the 7 hours I waited, and fast forward to 4AM.]


There is now a line. A long, long line stretching about a quarter mile to the back of the lot, and then turning 90 degrees for another quarter mile. The droves had arrived. Insanity.

[Where did that recession go? I thought it was around here somewhere... ]

Matt and I are first, and aside from some character disputes about people incorrectly believing they were first, things went smoothly. We were properly aligned at the seam between doors. Very shortly before the doors were to open at 5, the line jumpers started to accumulate at the sides of the doors on either side of the line. People started to joke that there was a line, assuming that they were just misguided... but it became evident that these people had no intention of operating in good faith.

People began to yell, and I'm sure that things were thrown. Those of us at the front had speculated that tickets would be distributed for the items in high demand, but short in supply. Minutes before the store opened, it was clear we were wrong. The crowd was getting out of hand. I'm not sure if they were really excited or trying to undermine the jumpers, but the surge of people pushed forward... and, in doing so, they pushed Matt, me and everyone else in the front of the line into the doors.

When the doors opened, it was clear that there was no organization whatsoever. The running commenced as hundreds of shoppers poured through the door without regard to each other, or the things around them. It was ridiculous. It was dangerous.

So, I sprint with the crowd back to Electronics. I almost stepped on someone who fell in front of me, and there were people smashing into shelves that couldn't navigate the turns. I run past the 32" and 19" TVs, get to electronics and ask the sales person at the boat for my TV. I was directed to another counter and arrive third in line. The people in front of me are requested the laptops and the other small electronics in the ad, and a guy that I was in line with got behind me and asked if this was where the TV's were. We get to the counter, only to be informed that TVs are mixed in with the rest of the TV's in the aisle.

I sprint back to to the aisle to see absolute chaos... and all but a few of the 19" TVs are in some one's hand. I find Matt clinging to a 32" TV for dear life and ducked down the iron aisle. I stop with him to catch my breath, and hold on to the TV while he goes to grab a 19 inch. He comes back and tells me that while I was in line, a fist fight broke out over the last 32" TV, and that there were only two of the 42" TVs and were gone in the first minute. People are running around and past us.

It. Was. Ridiculous.

Defeated, we make our way to the checklanes. Matt bought a grand's worth of crap, and I demanded to see a manager.

Now, let me preface what I am about to say with this: I am usually a very understanding person, especially when it comes to retail. I'm generally very calm, so much so in most situations that my calm can be unsettling. I have worked on Black Friday in a big box retail.

I came un-fucking-glued.

I went on a tirade up one side and down another of 'Hugh,' the manager that was sent to me.

IS THIS HOW YOU WANT TO RUN YOUR BUSINESS? FIRST OF ALL, WHY IS THERE NO SECURITY DETAIL IN THE PARKING LOT? THERE ARE A THOUSAND PEOPLE OUT THERE. THIS IS QUINCY, NOT GREENWICH, CONNECTICUT. QUINCY RESIDENTS AREN'T EXACTLY KNOWN FOR THEIR PROPENSITY TO BE CIVIL.

Hugh: Corporate said that there wasn't to be a police detail.

WELL, THAT WAS A BAD DECISION. BADDD. THERE ARE A LOT OF PEOPLE OUT THERE ALL HERE FOR THE SAME THING. THERE WAS A FIST-FIGHT OVER THE LAST TV.

Hugh: I'm sorry. I agree that it was a bad decision.

WHY DID YOU ALLOW IT? AND FURTHER MORE, YOU EXPECT YOUR CUSTOMER TO SPRINT TO THE BACK OF THE STORE? HONESTLY?? THAT'S YOUR EXPECTATION OF YOUR CUSTOMERS? SOMEONE COULD HAVE BEEN SERIOUSLY HURT. I ALMOST STEPPED ON SOMEONE. SOMEONE COULD HAVE BEEN TRAMPLED! THIS IS DANGEROUS. THIS IS A JOKE!

I WAITED SEVEN HOURS. SEVEN! SEV-EN! I HAVE A BAD KNEE AND I CAN'T EASILY RUN. IS THIS REALLY YOUR BEST DECISION? I WAITED THAT LONG, AND FOR NOTHING BECAUSE I CAN'T RUN. IF SOMEONE WAS OUT THERE IN A WHEEL CHAIR, WOULD YOU EXPECT THEM TO WHEEL THEMSELVES TO THE BACK?

HOW DO YOUR INSURANCE CARRIERS FEEL ABOUT THAT? YOU WANT THE RUNNING OF THE BULLS THROUGH YOUR STORE? REALLY? THAT'S HOW YOU'RE GOING TO RUN THIS STORE?

THEN I WAS DIRECTED TO THE WRONG PLACE AND BECAUSE OF THIS DELAY, LOST MY PURCHASE.

WHY DIDN'T YOU OFFER TICKETS LIKE EVERY OTHER MAJOR RETAILER? WHY?

Hugh: We were told not to.

ANOTHER BAD DECISION. WHY WOULDN'T YOU, AS SOMEONE WHO IS TRYING TO ADVANCE YOUR CAREER, LOOK AT THIS DECISION, REALIZE IT'S A BAD ONE, THEN ACT ON IT? THIS IS RIDICULOUS. IF YOU ONLY HAVE TWO OF A CERTAIN ITEM, AND YOU KNOW THAT EVERYONE IS HERE FOR IT, YOU COULD HAVE PREVENTED THIS ENTIRE FUCKING MESS BY JUST MAKING TICKETS!

I WAITED FOR SEVEN HOURS. I WAS THE *FIRST* PERSON IN LINE, AND GOT NOTHING THAT I CAME FOR. HOW IS THAT FAIR? WHY DOES THAT MAKE ME WANT TO PATRONIZE YOUR ESTABLISHMENT?

Hugh: You can call the number and file a complaint.

WHAT NUMBER?

Hugh: 1-800-WALMART.

WHAT IS YOUR NAME?

Hugh: Hugh.

LAST NAME?

Hugh: I don't release it. It's just something I do. It's personal.

IS THAT A POLICY?

Hugh: No, it's just something I do.

OKAYYY? AND YOU'RE THE MANAGER? IF WHEN I CALL TO FILE FORMAL COMPLAINT AND JUST SAY 'HUGH' THEY'LL KNOW TO WHOM I AM REFERRING?

Hugh: No, I'm not the manager.

THEN WHO IS?

Hugh: Mark Disla

AM I EVEN GOING TO BE ABLE TO GET OUT OF THE PARKING LOT? THERE'S NO SECURITY OUT THERE, AND THE LINE WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY CAR. I'M IN THE SPOT CLOSEST TO THE DOOR ... BECAUSE I WAS THE FIRST PERSON HERE!

I told him that I knew it wasn't his fault, but that something was handled very, very poorly. Someone could have been seriously hurt or trampled. I told him that someone could have died. We stormed away to be greeted by yet another manager and someone from Assets Protection.

They asked how our experience was, and I saw another opportunity to vent my anger. I went off again. He again gave me the 'so sorry' BS, and said that he hoped my experience next year would be better.

I looked at him disbelievingly, and said calmly, "There will not ever be a next year." Then got enraged again, "I'm never coming here again!"

I stormed out. I had never liked WalMart, and ever since becoming an educated consumer have never been there. There was a good deal, and I was willing to throw my money at them, but they blew it. Never again will I consider giving them any of my money. Never ever.

¶ 22:27

Ugh. He's killing me. I miss him, but he's so weird...

He said that if he sees me again, he'd crumble back into my arms. But, would that really be as terrible as he seems to think? God, what I wouldn't give just to hold him again.

I miss you, roo. :'-(

¶ 20:58